昨天来了个老外

,进到办公室,前台小姐左看右看,大家都在打游戏,只有自己比较清闲,面带微笑的:
前台小姐:“Hello.”
老外:“Hi.”
前台小姐:“You have what thing?”
老外:“Can you speak english?”
前台小姐:“If I not speak english, I am speaking what?”
老外:“Can anybody else speak english?”
前台小姐:“You yourself look. All people are playing, no people have time, you can wait, you wait, you not wait, you go!”
老外:“Good heavens. Anybody here can speak English?”
前台小姐:“Shout what shout, quiet a little, you on earth have what thing?”
老外:“I want to speak to your head.”
前台小姐:“Head not zai. You tomorrow come!”

照这词霸一个个翻译就行
前台小姐:你有什么事情
老外:你能说英语么?
前台小姐:如果我没有说英语,我现在说的是什么?
老外:还有别人会说英语么?
前台小姐:你自己看看,所有人都在忙,没有人有时间,如果你可以等,你就在这里等,
等不了的话,你可以走。
老外:我的天啊,这有人能说英语么?
前台小姐:叫什么叫。安静一点,你到这究竟有什么事情。
老外:我想和你们头谈谈。
前台小姐:头不在,你明天在来。
中国式英语,呵呵。